I didn’t have any idea, how Fizz or I would cope once she came home, so I was feeling slightly calmer that Fizzle’s had done so well already. Even though Fizz had walked / hopped around the surgery, and had leapt into the car like a Gazelle, I was still totally petrified, that something would go wrong. The total panic rising from me was because now I was totally alone, no vets ,no nurses ….. Now it was just Fizz and I just dealing with this all alone, just the way we liked it.
With my heart racing, and Dai holding Fizzly up with the Cot Bumper, we managed opened the front door, I was in front with the lead in both sense’s of the word . Dai was supporting Fizz, and Fizz was wobbling between us, we must have looked a right sight, then all of us squeezed into our home. It was a Congo line with a difference, all we needed was the music, but even without it , we walked in the house in style !!
When Fizzly got first diagnosed with Bone Cancer, I knew she would have to have her leg removed, but even knowing it …….. seeing it and living it, are a totally different prospect. If I’m honest I don’t know if I was ready, for the shock of seeing her ” Minus Leg “. It wasn’t the Incision though, as I could only see a part of it, as Emma the Nurse hadn’t been able to remove the whole thing ?!? As our Fizzle’s was not happy about her tugging on the sticky Plaster, especially as she had just made her Marathon, all Around the Surgery !!
So the Incision was not the shocking part it’s just the hole, the empty space that should have held her leg, this space was truly shocking. I almost burst into tears, every time I looked at where, Just a short day before where her Black and Tan Leg had been. It made me almost aghast at the simple thought process,that was ….. Yes ! My dog was for now on going to be moving around, on 3 legs instead of 4.
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3 Legs Instead of 4 Fizz never Lost Her SMILE !!! |
Feeling’s of Shock , Pain, Heart~break and Horror, are all normal thoughts, and nothing to feel guilty about, you have gone through this so quickly. That it takes time to come to terms, with the thought’s that YOU have made this decision, and that decision was to TAKE OFF YOUR DOG’S LEG !!! Feeling these thing’s are fine and normal, but this is the most Important Part …….
You Can’t Show How You Feel !! ………………………..
You have to Show them that Everything is Normal !!!
When a Person or Child is having a Limb removed, especially to Cancer when there will be a continuing Battle, even after the Trauma of the Surgery. You then use Speech and you can explain the, Why’s What’s and How’s, and help them to adjust or gain acceptance, or understanding with words. You can tell them that they are going to hurt afterwards ……… But I Promise It will Stop Hurting Soon ……
You can say comforting thing’s or explain why the limb needs to be removed and what it will life be like after the removal. When the Understandable Panic Set’s In then, all these things can be done through words, reading or just Listening to What the Doctor’s or Specialists have to say. People rely on having Conversation’s and the Ability to find out Information, we have forgotten how to actually feel Body Language and all the Subtle Sign’s that Animals can Pick Up Instantly !!!
All of these things fall by the Wayside, when it come’s to helping your Pet, to Understand, or know What and Why this is Happening to Them. Animals don’t use SPEECH they understand common word’s and What mean’s what, when you train them as puppies, eg :- Sit, Stay, Down, Stop Chewing on My Best Shoe’s ……… Eat Daddies Shoe’s Instead Of MINE !!! Don’t eat My Bloody Table !!!
Or in Fizz’s Case …………….
Don’t eat My ENTIRE CHOCOLATE BIRTHDAY CAKE !!!
See it was Karma that’s why, she had her leg off ! She ate my Birthday Cake 
!!
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And She Always Managed To Look Totally Innocent !!!
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I don’t know whether, I did this the right way or wrong way, but I do know that Fizzle’s never acted unsure or scared, apart from one time a couple of days after her amputation, but I will talk about that next time and as usual I’m jumping ahead of my Tale. What I’m trying to do is show you how if you act Calm, and Sure of Yourself in any situation, even with a perfectly healthy dog, I have always told people, that when it come’s to dog’s then ………..
Always ……. Mean What You Say and Fake it !!
The Image of how your feeling even if your totally lying, It’s the image of Calm, Assured and Totally In Control …….. Will then mean that your pet will feel Calm, Assured and Totally In Control ! Because if Mummy is so Calm and Happy then there is nothing I need to worry about and whatever Has Happened to Me Can’t be THAT BAD ?? Otherwise Mummy would be worried or Panicked !!
Those of you who have had children ………
Did you ever notice that if you didn’t make a FUSS or Panicked, when your TODDLER fell over………Then they Didn’t Cry or Make a FUSS ?
But if you did make a fuss …… then the same child, and the same Fall ……..
They would become totally hysterical ???
Well its exactly the same with your Pet , When they come Home For the First Time Since their Surgery !! Please Believe Me …… Your Pet will Deal with the Amputation a Hell of a LOT BETTER
If you act like Nothing is Different and ………..
They may have had a LEG OFF …….. But it doesn’t CHANGE ANYTHING !!!
This is the attitude that you will have to find deep inside of you, and this is how you have to be whenever you are around your Pet. When your away from them, then you can collapse into a heap and cry, as I must admit, I did my fair share of crying or venting. I had to find ways to help me deal, with all the pent up worry and panic, that I had to hide from my family and Fizzle’s.
This was my main reason for doing this Blog as I think especially if you have children, then you need to take control of the situation and be strong for them and your pet. So I wanted to be a place where you don’t need to be strong, and you can just tell me how it is, and not worry about upsetting me 🙂 I have been through this and I had to deal with it on my own and it was truly extremely difficult. You can only be strong for so long, without a helping hand or a comforting ear,
I know I did it ….. and it was not a pleasant time.
But I knew that if I wasn’t strong for Fizzle’s, then she herself would have given up, and I was never going to let her go without a fight. The Bond that is shared between an owner and their pet is something that is so intense they almost coexist as one. The relationship between Fizz and I was exactly that and more, its a bond that I haven’t had with any other pets that I have owned. This does not mean that I didn’t or don’t totally adore all my other Pets, Past and Present.
But we just had this amazing understanding, and bond that I think ……….
……….. You will only ever have once in a Life time ! 
This is the mind set that will get you through those first few days, and it’s something that helped Fizz and I, to deal with everything that was happening to her during this time. Even though I wouldn’t want to lose My Fizzle’s ever, this Illness made our already amazing Bond, into something totally Spiritual. Its something that has made it possible for me, to go forward after the Devastating Loss, when she lost her Bravest Battle, and she finally Succumbed.
Its this Strength of Character that Fizz showed, to everyone who met her, while she was going through her Amputation and further Treatment. That has made it possible for me to try, in a small way to emulate her Courage and Greatness of Spirit, for me to move forward and carry on without her. Then try to find a way through her, to help other’s when they are going through, this Ordeal of when you amputate a Pet’s Limb, be it because of Cancer or for any other reason.
She was my heart and her loss almost destroyed me, but if I help one person to cope or deal, with this trauma and this awful disease of Cancer. Then I know my Fizzle’s will be watching down, and hopefully she will be a lil proud of her devoted Mummy. Who is only just managing to hold it together, as some days are darker than other’s, but this Blog has given me a Purpose, and …………
I hope I am doing Fizzly Justice, as I do it all in her name ……. 
Fizzly
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My Fizzly and Emma the day, she came home !! |
You are most definitely doing Fizzly justice!!! I feel the love and devotion in everything you write. You describe so perfectly the bond that Magnum and I shared as well. I too didn’t know if I could go on without her and it was the desire to make something good come out of her untimely death that also motivated me to continue to be part of Tripawds and to adopt an older rescue dog just a few months after losing her (even though my heart was still aching, still aches).
Thank you so much for sharing. I love reading your blogs (although sometimes I can be a bit slow to get to them).
Karen
Hey Karen and Magnum
You can take as long as you like to read my posts as I take forever to send them out 😛 and I’m a nightmare at returning messages !!
These Rotties seem to inspire total devotion and never ending love from their mummies and I know myself I don’t think I will ever get over my Fizzles, and still find myself lost without her …….
I must admit that its getting tougher to write the closer I get to her passing, but I think it will help me in the long run, but I’m sure there will be lots of tears as well 🙂
I want to thank you for messaging me after reading because I have many people reading my posts but hardly ever to I get some feedback so I want to take this moment to just say thank you Karen
talk to you soon
lots of love zena, Fizzly and Magnum in Spirit xoxoxox